I just stepped in a steaming pile of IVAW...

This time left by Jeff Englehart. I'm not going to go through this turds entire life saga, but (shocka!) he has truth deficit disorder, like the rest of his ilk. He claimed that the Army was using Willie Pete to burn civilians in Fallujah, then (naturally) it turned out he was actually outside the city, didn't actually see it, heard it from some dude, and heard a guy calling for it over the radio.

Superbowl Six Romeo, this is Charlie Victor.
Go Charlie Victor .
Roger, I have 6-8 COB's (civilians on the battlefield) and I need a shit-ton of Willie Pete over.
Roger, get me a grid and we will fry those little bastards, then maybe we ought to get back to the dudes shooting at us.

Anyway, again, won't go through his ever-changing auto[fallatio]biography, just trust me when I say, you've heard this tale before.

Anyhoo, when not posting at IVAW, he has a blog, run by the E-4 Mafia, which is like, I don't know, maybe the most original thing I have EVER HEARD IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!!! His quote of a lifetime is "I guess while I was there, the general attitude was: a dead Iraqi is just another dead Iraqi." [For the record, I would like mine to be "Everytime I read something written by those crapweasels at IVAW, I wanted to shower in Willie Pete."] I would love to do a line by line takedown of his magnum opus, but frankly, I am tired and just want to get on my train to head to Nuevo Jersey for the weekend. Without further ado, me in red, him in our patent pending shiteovision-
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Support G.I. Resistance!

Much noise is being made today as to what true GI Resistance actually means. In a confusing, often obfuscating and divisive hodgepodge of arguments, a variety of voices try to pinpoint and isolate a singularly accepted standard of GI Resistance. Sometimes in stark arrogance, members of the antiwar community bicker back and forth as to what supporting resistance entails, without actually considering the point of view of the soldier fighting the war. For instance, words like cowardice, loyalty, and even duty are used by some to attack, condescend, and humiliate war resisters, soldier dissenters, AWOL’s, and deserters. These arguments are seriously flawed, yet each stance tries to establish itself as the only acceptable means of supporting GI Resistance.

The effluvience of this ephemeral cornucopia of fecal felicitation fornicates fruitlessly with the fetid flatulence of a firefly's phallus.

Wait.....what?

Right, my sentence though made no less sense than his paragraph above. My grandad would have looked at him sideways and told him to take the turd out of his mouth and speak English. A wise man my grandad. Say what you will about old Jeff though, but he loves him his adjectives, and he's all about grouping them in threes. Read the paragraph above and tell me it doesn't sound like the post-pubescent version of the kid doing a book report who finishes it up only to find he is 17 words short, so he just adds in where he can.

There are countless ways to crack an egg [I use napalm and follow it up with armor piercing depleted uranium rounds], and in a generalized effort to end the war in Iraq and Afghanistan, a plethora of tactics will be needed. Most of us know that by now. But what we fail to realize is that sometimes the means to immediately end a war start with the boots on the ground. So who then are we, as activists, veterans, and concerned citizens, [Seriously dude, what is with you and the number 3?] to place moral standards on any soldier who would detriment the war effort in any way she or he sees fit? The question is not what GI Resistance is, but rather how can we support it any way shape or form?

To resist or not to resist, that is the question; Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of chickenhawk rethuglicans, Or to take arms against a sea of tribbles, And by opposing, end them. To die, to sleep; No more; and by a sleep to say we end The heart-ache and the thousand natural Cheneys is heir to — 'tis a consummation and a conflagration of the emancipation proclamation from conjegation. Devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep; To sleep, perchance to dream. Ay, there's the rub, For in that sleep of death what dreams may come, of Haliburtons past present and future, When we have shuffled off this mortal coil, Must give us pause.

One only needs to open a U.S. history book to find examples of GI resistance throughout our years of war and conquest. As far back as the American Revolution, instances of GI rebellion were common, as underpaid, underfed, and ill-equipped regulars staged mutinies and revolts against what they saw as forced conscription, colonial elitism, and rampant war profiteering. In barbarous wars [as opposed to all those non-barbarous ones you read about] such [sic] our Civil War, soldiers plagued by the torment of battle and butchery deserted in massive numbers. AWOL’s were common throughout World War I, and studies on World War II show that soldiers from both sides had tendencies to deliberately aim astray when firing projectiles at enemy combatants. But it wasn’t until the Vietnam War that the true power of an organized underclass of soldiers showed is amazing potential to end military adventurism.

Read that again, and take it all in. Going AWOL, deserting and malingering aren't things to be ashamed of people! There is a long illustrious tradition of shirking duty! All of our forefathers did it, and who are you to do elsewise? What dumbass seems to forget is that many of these folks were pressed into service for years and years, whereas any troop can get out now fairly easily. But, one can only get that far in the discussion if you are willing to accept what this clown says as fact really happened. But, let's roll on to his maligning the Vietnam Vets.

Through amazing instances of organizing, communicating, and class solidarity, American service members utilized a whole array of tactics to make their stance against a war they saw as immoral and wrong. From civil disobedience to direct action--from outspoken “Rap Sessions”, antiwar coffee houses, underground newspapers [The Sniper!], “search and evades” missions, and mass desertions, to more extreme measures as combat refusals, equipment sabotage and assassinations of commanding officers in the field--soldiers challenged the power structure of the military from within, and sent shockwaves through the establishment that were felt all the way to the architects of war in Washington, D.C.

Back to his use of the holy trinity, this time of "combat refusals, equipment sabotage and assassinations of commanding officers in the field." Not to put too blunt a point on it here, but this man is asserting that fragging of officers is a good thing. And that these were good tactics. Dude is frutier than mexican batshit, and ye can quote me on that.

Anyway, he goes on in this vein, vane, veighn (see, I too can use 3, three, tri!) for quite a while, and honestly my eyes clouded over, so let's skip to the final paragraph where no doubt Marc Anthony is killed and Cleopatra uses an Asp for breast augmentation surgery.

Iraq Veterans Against the War is proving every day that we are the vanguard organization in the movement to ending the war. [Start a movement! Eat a prune!] But we must remember that our credibility does not derive from media appearances, placements in protest rallies, or the medals on our uniforms. [The credibility of your movement is about equal to the one I started by eating the aforementioned prune.] No, it comes from the fact that we are still soldiers, and we never leave another soldier behind. Our credibility lies with the soldiers that are still tied to this war, not with the public who overwhelmingly supports an immediate withdrawal, and not with the politicians promising peace with empty rhetoric. No one but the soldiers have the power to end the war now. And as an organization inherently dedicated to the soldier, our sole function should be reaching out to them, helping them to resist, helping them to come home. That is the true essence of solidarity, the true meaning of “Support GI Resistance,” and when it finally comes together, then we’ll really see the beginning of the end.

Can we challenge their patriotism yet?